One always thinks that death is something that happens in someone else's house. All that we have to do is feel sorry offer a helping hand. But death is a really unpredictable rogue - you only know it has hit you after it leaves the door.
it has now hit me - and left behind my husband. My husband who did everything with great care - scolded us for being careless ....and he was hit by a car....fatally.
How does one accept that one is not going to have the person most closest to you near anymore. How does one accept that the person that one takes for granted is not really granted - hes been taken away. How does one accept that no matter what one does that person has just disappeared from the picture of your life...???
I dont know. I have no answers. Only questions about the greatest betrayal that life could have put me through - why him why me why us....?
i grope around for excuses reasons - to reassure myself - but at the end of it - the question WHY still stares back. No matter how much I recover from the fits of crying, the fits of suffocation that strike me when memories poke me... I will never understand WHY - why my husband, why me why my children...
Its so nice to hear people saying that ALL HAPPENS FOR THE BEST - but no it doesnt. Life is unfair to many- and I happen to be one of them.
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